Emails were supposed to go out yesterday afternoon if we were presented to one of the schools that requires an extra step (phone interview, letters of recommendation, etc.). I did not receive one, which means that I won't be attending Oregon State University for my clinical year. Which means that my only hope of seeing my husband on anything approaching a regular basis (he lives 6 hours away from OSU) has been shot down.
I always acknowledged it as a possibility, but I thought I had a strong special consideration to get one of those spots. But I was still realistic and so while this was disappointing, I wasn't crushed or anything. My husband, on the other hand, had a very strong reaction that kind of took me by surprise. He wanted me to fight for a spot, call someone, email someone, demand to make my case heard. He was angry that I seemed to be giving up. The degree of his reaction honestly shocked me and I tried for five minutes on Skype to convince him that this is out of my hands. They've been very clear with us, once those placements are made they are ironclad. There is no fighting it and if I tried I'd just make an ass of myself.
I'm airing this dirty laundry here because the goal of this blog has always been to portray the reality of being a Ross student. I talk about the hard stuff so that people can get an accurate understanding of the trials and challenges you'll face as a Rossie.
So my husband and I had our first "fight" in a long time because of Ross. It wasn't a major one and we resolved things quickly, but it hurt me that he thought I wasn't as invested in seeing one another as he was. It hurt me that he was hurting because we'll spend another year apart. And it sucked that it was completely outside of my control and Ross let me down in such a personal way.
A lot of spouses/couples fight down here. The stress of living in a foreign country, the fact that students don't have time for their significant others, and the fact that VIPs (what we call our partners) can't get work because they aren't Kittitian citizens, combines into a state of boredom and helplessness that makes them feel very frustrated. It's ended a few marriages.
Just another thing to consider if you're reading this as a future Rossie.