Mr. Ross shenanigans.

Last night was the sixth Mr. RUSVM contest since I moved to the island. I've attended three of them thus far and last night's was definitely the best show (apart from the sweltering hot new venue, which was truly awful). The skits are always raunchy and involve a lot of swearing, cross-dressing, stripping and hypersexual humor, so if you go you're already signing up for some pretty low brow entertainment. And I'm fine with that, I laugh just as hard as everyone else. Never in a million years would I have thought that while attending vet school I would see my pathology professor smearing cherries on a student's chest, my epidemiology professor spank another student with a stuffed, pink penis, and my clinical pathology professor having her face, neck and chest stroked by the tail of a male student wearing a Halle Berry's catwoman costume.

Although, let me point out to any incoming firsties, hoping foul language and penis jokes will carry your skits without any actual witty dialogue or concepts never works because the crowd sees right through it.

But last night was my first Mr. RUSVM which I spent stone cold sober. Mind you, I never get raging drunk at these events. I'm just not the sort of person who enjoys being a sloppy hot mess in public, especially in front of my professors (who attend and judge this contest). Usually I have a few drinks and maintain a pleasant buzz throughout the evening that makes the jokes funnier. Last night, though, all I had to drink was a bottled water. Two reasons: 1. I had a dive this morning and didn't want to be hung over. 2. It was very, very hot in there and I felt like the combination of heat + alcohol was an almost perfect recipe for vomiting. If the smell of the ladies bathroom was any indication, I was right.

So being the only sober one at the party, it allowed me to get a good look at how a lot of people were acting. I have to say, the current 1st and 3rd semester classes were the perpetrators of the worst behavior throughout the evening. I had a girl in 3rd who was already drunk partway into the first (of four) acts spill beer in my lap and then act completely nonchalant when I turned around to confront her about it. Another 3rd student who had taken part in a skit where he had cherries smeared all over his chest stood next to me and kept pressing his sticky, hairy belly into the back of one of my classmate's head, and was asked repeatedly to stop and only leered drunkenly at us and kept on doing it. A gaggle of first semester girls stood in front of my row and the rows directly in front of  and behind me, blocking about a dozen people from being able to see the stage. Repeated requests to either move or sit down were met with eye rolls, lip smacks and complete dismissal.

Blogger has a feature which allows me to see which words and phrases are being put into search engines to find this blog, so I know when future Rossies are reading due to the uptick in things like "Ross student blog" and "Ross vet student." Which I'm getting a lot of right now. So to any future Rossies reading this... DON'T BE THESE PEOPLE! It's rude, disrespectful, and mostly just tacky and unprofessional behavior. Yes, it's a contest full of naked men and dick jokes. That's okay, you can still have fun and behave as though you have self respect and respect for those around you. If in doubt, look to the behavior of the 6th and 7th semester students for an example. Invariably they are not the ones falling over, spilling drinks and acting a fool.

P.S. As a Broadwayphile, seeing Avenue Q butchered by people who didn't bother to learn the lyrics made my soul hurt. When the first notes came on I was like an ADHD kid on pixie sticks, bouncing in my chair and squealing. It turned into disappointment and tears.